cautiously

I'm at the Beacon Theatre right now while Scars on 45 open for Tori Amos. Ah, nostalgia. '90s angsty rock!

I keep think about the elections last night. I am cautiously hopeful. I've been near tears off and on all day. Maybe we can really take back our country from the bigoted fuckwads in charge. 

I'm less stressed than I have been lately. Work's in a bit of a lull and I'm actually enjoying my freelance project. I'm also making a big effort to offload my stress before I get home, in case my stress is causing Isabel's stress. (Missed that story? Our two-year-old cat, Isabel, is stressed and therefore pissing in inappropriate places.)

Writing is still going slower than I want but at least it's happening. I've sussed out the climax to the eye-stabby novel, and I'm nearly to it in the draft. Progress!

Okay, kittens. I'm going to put the phone down and enjoy the show. Blood and kisses, all of you!

the rest of the year

I've come up with a plan for how to approach the rest of the year, in life and in writing. I've spent a lot of time thinking about how I approach my productivity, and I've reached the conclusion that it's time to try something different. So for the rest of the year, I will have two weekday evenings for writing and music, and two for housework and freelancing. One evening will just be for fun (Monday pool league!). On the weekends I can try to do all the things both days. I think this will help me feel better about things because I'll have longer stretches of time to spend on things instead of doing a tiny bit of everything every day. And I'll have a shorter to-do list most of the time.
For the writing, I'd like to knock out the rest of the eye-stabby first draft in the next ten days, max.  All I have left to draft is the climax and the end, so that is (hopefully!) doable. The second half of the month is for fixing Demon Child and for powering through the rest of the first draft of Janny. Then December is for revisions and finding beta readers, and for revisiting the ghost/witch novel to sort out revisions on that.
Basically, I'm trying to finish things. It's been several years since I really properly finished a writing project, and it's time to get my ass in gear with this stuff. Nobody can write my books but me. Nobody can submit my books but me. I need to get over the fear and DO IT.
Anybody want to do mutual cheerleading? Give me a shout! Doing NaNoWriMo? Hit me there as Thistlewicche. Tell me what your goals are for the rest of the year, kittens. I'd love to have some productivity company. And Happy belated Samhain!

fall is in the air

Hi, everybody. The day after tomorrow will be September already. This summer really flew by, and I have say, I'm ready for autumn. Give me crisp mornings with brilliant sunny afternoons; the sweet tang of woodsmoke curling through the air; zucchini bread and pumpkin pie for breakfast; red, yellow, orange leaves shivering in the breeze; drinking tea and watching rain fall outside.... I am really over this summer, obviously!

I've gotten stuck on the novelette. I know what needs to happen for the climax emotionally but not action-wise, so I'm spinning my wheels. Maybe I should switch back over to the eye-stabby novel for a couple days.

What are your creative goals for September? I'd love to hear about them! Mine are to finish the novelette and to make some really solid progress on the novel. Play my clarinet more.

I've got some vacation time left this year, so I'm contemplating a staycation. Sounds nice, right? I also want to go apple-picking in the next few weeks. 

On the activism front, I'm taking a class in emergency bystander first aid, and I've gone to a couple protests. How about you, kittens? What action are you taking?

That's it for me, I have to get to work. I hope you're all taking care of yourselves and making your voices heard in whatever way you do that.

Blood and kisses!

follow me down to the river

Just another summer day here in the center of the universe . . .
How's everyone doing? I can't believe it's mid August already. I've gotten a lot of writing done this summer, but not as much as I'd hoped, as always. Still, I broke 50k on the novel first draft, and I'm doing a heavy revision on the novelette right now (it'll be a novella after this go-round, ha!) and I've drafted a couple short stories. I've started pondering Janny and Syska again too; I'll get back to them this fall. And the ideas. Like ripe fruit ready for the plucking. I have so many ideas right now! Anybody need some?? I could set up an ideas-for-sale booth in the goblin market, and make a killing.
I've read a few books since last time I was here. In no particular order:
13) Phantom Pains by Mishell Baker. The sequel to Borderline. I enjoyed this one, can't wait for book three!
14) The Girl from Everywhere by Heidi Heilig. Holy wow I loved this YA time-travel adventure. It's so much more than that, though! Family, and time travel, and love, and sailing the open seas! I'm buying the sequel after work. Seriously, read this book, everyone!
15) Grim Tidings by Caitlin Kittredge. Fast and furious and grim and gallows humor. Everything I'd hoped for. I can't wait to read the sequel to this one!
16) The Refrigerator Monologues by Catherynne Valente. As always, Valente kills it in this. The voice and narrative styling are amazing, the stories are great. She's a writer's writer. Everything I've read by he has been stunning.
17) Snow White graphic novel by Phelan. This is a lovely retelling of Snow White in NYC as the Depression hits. The story works really well within that setting; I quite enjoyed this.
18) Gideon by Alex Gordon. Whoa. This is a creepy paranormal thriller. I was all in, the entire time I was reading. Definitely recommended. A third one on today's list for which I can't wait wait to read the sequel!
My struggle these last couple weeks has been feeling unseen. Does this happen to any of you? It doesn't matter what you say or do, it feels like people just don't see you? I've really fallen down that rabbit hole, and it's time to fix it. I'm working on the attitude. I'm dressing differently than usual. I might *gasp!* start wearing a little makeup sometimes. Anything to pull myself out of this bullshit beaten-down rut I've been in.
Let's be honest, sometimes it's hard to be happy. Especially given what's happening in America these days. So tell me, please, one thing that has made you happy in the last couple weeks. It could be anything from getting married to reading a good book to signing with an agent to meeting a cute puppy this morning. I want to hear it!
And now I have to get back to work. I'll come back soon.
Blood and kisses!

a writing question

Happy Wednesday, everyone! I'm just passing through for a moment to share an observation and ask a question.
I've been trying to better prioritize my writing, especially now that I have fewer weekly commitments than I used to. And while the writing is going fairly well, I've noticed that I have a really difficult time giving myself permission to write before I do housework, before I exercise, before I make dinner. So it's often 11 pm before I give myself permission to write, and we all know I'm probably not doing my best work at 11 pm after working all day and doing those other things. I think this is the thing I'm struggling with the most; giving myself permission to let other things go for a while so that I can be my best writer self.
Do any of you have a hard time with this? What are you struggling with the most as a creative person?

so many days

Hello lovelies, it's been a while! As always, I didn't intend for it to be so, but life happens. I've been pretty preoccupied between day job, freelancing, writing, music, roommates, the state of politics in America today, etc. But there have been good things happening. I attended the Rainforest Writing Retreat in March, and wrote 27,000 words in five days! I've written a couple short stories! I'm on my second round of revisions on my novelette! 4th Street Fantasy was two weekends ago, and was amazing as always! My longest-standing friend in the world and her husband visited last weekend!

And of course, I've read some good books this year  (super short comments on each because otherwise I'd be here for hours):

1) Descender vol 1. WHOA good sci-fi graphic novel.

2) Pretty Deadly vol. 1. You dig weird Western? This is crazy good!

3) Nimona by Noelle Stevenson. This graphic novel got me right in the feels. Loved it!

4) Life Without a Recipe by Diana Abu-Jaber. I love everything she writes. She uses the English language so beautifully, I fall into her words.

5) Last First Snow by Max Gladstone. Everything Max writes is brilliant.

6) Blackbirds by Chuck Wendig. This was like reading an action movie!

7) The Archived by Victoria Schwab. Atmospheric YA. I need to get the sequel.

8) The Walls Around Us by Nova Ren Suma. This is some creepy YA! So good!

9) Black Dog by Caitlin Kittredge. Action-oriented, out-of-the-norm urban fantasy. I just picked up the sequel.

10) The Silent Woman by Janet Malcom. REALLY interesting book about Sylvia Plath!

11) Once Broken Faith by Seanan McGuire. I love the whole Toby Daye series.

12) An Unkindness of Magicians by Kat Howard. Kat blows me away, everything she writes is amazing!

I'll be focusing on my writing for the summer, but I'll be dropping by here every so often to update you all on how that's going. My goals are to finish revising the novelette and start submitting it, and to have a finished first draft of the novel I'm powering through. And to spend more time reading! What's everyone else's plans for the summer?

Time to get back to writing. Blood and kisses, everyone, I'll be back here soon.

moon-shaped

Agh, that frustrating moment when you had a blog post mostly written and then your draft disappears . . . Ah, well. I'll do my best to re-create it.
I feel as though I am continuing to improve, a little bit every day. I'm writing pretty regularly. Only a new project, though: I'm not prepared to revisit the projects I was so bogged down in before. I think it'll be a while yet before I do look at those again. Work has calmed, and so has home (as much as home can when sharing space with so many people). I was recently on vacation for a week, and it was very nice to not be in the city, to have some time away, to catch up with people. Of course I missed my cats terribly, though, and they were both angry at me when I got home!
I can't wait for autumn to really begin. I am very ready for chill, crisp air; for sweaters and boots; for the changing of the leaves, and bonfires, and tea, and cozy nights at home reading.
Books!
15) The Thorn and the Blossom by Theodora Goss. This is a beautiful story of love and magic. The language is lush, and both characters felt very real to me. Definitely a keeper.
16) Full Fathom Five by Max Gladstone.I've nattered on about the Craft Sequence books before. They're brilliant, engaging, and very different from other fantasy series out there. Keepers, every one. Max is a great writer, and also a great speaker; if you get the chance to see him, be it a reading or a panel at a con or whatever, do it.
17) Daughter of Deep Silence by Carrie Ryan. I devoured this YA novel of revenge and hidden identities. It's a fast, smart, dark read that you will fall into. Definitely worth reading!
18) A Green and Ancient Light by Frederic S. Durbin. This is a quietly beautiful book about war and love and loss and magic. It surprised me, to be honest; I felt very emotionally connected to the characters and the story almost immediately. Every action is believable, the love is palpable, and every moment of tension is had me in suspense. Please check this one out; it's lovely.
And now, on with my Sunday. I have today off from pool, hurray! So I'm doing some things around the house, some freelancing, and running a couple errands. I'm so used to my Sundays being occupied that having the entire weekend free feels decadent.
More soon. Blood and kisses!

too hot to be clever

It's been hot as hell in New York for the past week or so, and we are all slowly melting into the concrete. It's incredibly difficult to find the fortitude to work on anything at all when the heat is leeching away your will to live.
That said, I just finished a rush proofreading project. Can't wait for that check to arrive so I can throw it at my credit card! Between that and doing several critiques for writer friends recently, I haven't managed to finish reading any books. I'm working on it though; today I started reading The Thorn and the Blossom by Theodora Goss, and I'm partway through a few others. Book updates soon, my dears!
I've continued to putter around with whatever occurs to me, writing-wise, but I think in September I'll get back to Janny and Syska. I do rather like a couple of the things that I've been poking at over the last couple of weeks, though. . . .
Also in September I'm visiting family for a week. I can't wait!
This Friday is my last summer Friday in New York before said family visit. My plan is to sleep it, do some writing, do some reading, and maybe play a video game or watch a movie. Or maybe I'll go to the park, or the Cloisters. . . .
That's all for now. Sorry to be brief, but I don't have a lot to report. Hopefully I'll have more to discuss soon.
Blood and kisses, all!

this is your wilderness

I wrote the following two weeks ago, and then was unsure to post because I don't want to sound whiny or like I'm asking for attention or anything. Sometimes things need to be purged, though, and blogging is a good way of getting things out of my system. Sometimes things seem more approachable once I write/talk about them. So, older part of this entry:

 

Last weekend was 4th Street Fantasy, and this year was every bit as good as last year. Great people, conversation, panels. Late nights. I stuck pretty close to my VP classmates who also attended; I've been feeling tentative and unsure about things lately, so I needed that level of familiarity this year. I did meet some lovely people, and renewed acquaintance with some others, but that was mostly alongside my VP tribe.
Why am I so tentative and unsure these days? I think it's a slurry of several factors. I've been exhausted for a long time: work has been busy as hell and went pear-shaped a couple weeks ago when a higher-up left. We're working it out, and I think it'll be fine in another week or two. But transitions are draining. Things at home have been stressful, but we finally found a new roommate!! And I'm changing how I approach certain things, in the hope that that lessens the stress. On a whole other level (I'm sorry if this is a bit much but I think it's important for me to address it), a week and a half ago in Manhattan I saw a woman in the street just after she'd been hit by a car. I saw her, not surrounded by paramedics or anything, just lying there beneath the bumper of the car. I saw where she was bloodied from the collision. And that fucked up my head pretty solidly. I think about her a lot. And last but not least, I don't feel good about my writing right now. It's difficult for me to do it at all. I'm worried that my ghost/witch novel is not the right story at all for those characters. I don't know that I've figured out the right climax for Emmelina, and I've no idea how to get Janny to the ending of the novel. I feel stymied.
I need quiet time this summer. Down time. Alone time with books and movies and long walks and more books. And writing, once I find a level of comfort with it again. Self-care is important, and it's time for more of it.

 

I've lightened up a little bit since then, though the writing struggle continues. This last weekend I went out of town, and though I didn't really get any writing time while I was away, at least I got a change of scenery and a few days off work.

I've read a couple books lately:

11) A Rose-Red Chain by Seanan McGuire. Another solid entry in the October Daye series, and I can't wait for the next one!

12) Two Serpents Rise by Max Gladstone. This is the second book in the stunning, original Craft Sequence. I really enjoy Max's writing; his characters are well-fleshed-out, his language is vivid, as his world-building is incredible. Haven't tried him yet? Start with the first book in the series, Three Parts Dead!

13) The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison.Well-crafted characters, great court/political intrigue. I REALLY liked this one, and would happily read more in the series if more get written.

I've decided against Readercon this year, and Worldcon as well. There are multiple reasons, but the biggest one is that I have been pushing too hard for too long, and it's time for some self-care. So here's to a quiet, well-rested, creative July and August for us all. 

tattered lace and faded dreams

I'm thinking of taking a day off next week; I've been struggling with that overwhelmed feeling again. I think it's partially because I have so many problematic titles at work right now, and partially because I haven't been really on top of getting things done at home so I feel like I'm behind. BUT. I'm taking my daily vitamins, I'm drinking a lot less, I'm reading more. I'm not writing more yet, but I'll get there. I had a neat idea for a story the other day; hopefully I'll get around to writing that soon!
Two books to talk about:
9) Half-Resurrection Blues by Daniel Jose Older. WHOA. This book is a crazy rush. It's intense, and amazing, and I totally fell into this book. It's about a guy, Carlos, who's an inbetweener; he works for the New York Council of the Dead, and then shit happens. I need the next one!
10) City of Savages by Lee Kelly. This story is built on a lot of despair and rage. It's New York, two decades after WWIII. The city is a POW camp. While following on family through a stretch of their lives, you also learn what happened during the war and after, and how it became what it became. It's definitely a good read. Not a keeper for me, because I probably won't read it again, but I certainly enjoyed it.
I'm not sure how it got so late already. Per usual, I didn't manage to do half of what I intended to do this evening. I should go squeeze in a few minutes of work on something. Blood and kisses!

far to fall

Happy belated Beltane, everyone! Did anyone celebrate it? We had a nice brunch on Sunday before heading to our pool match.
This week has been chilly and damp. It's nice to have the rain; hopefully that means a good gardening year for everyone. We're getting a late start on. Our garden. Between freezing temps through the end of April and a bad springtime cold sweeping through our house, we haven't planted anything yet. I want to at least get some tomato starts happily settled into backyard pots this Saturday, and maybe some morning glories to cover an ugly section of fence, but that depends on how much freelance work I get done in the next couple days.
I managed to read another book! 7) The Escapement of Blackledge by Mary a Robinette Kowal. And okay, novella, but that still counts! It was her April Fools joke this year; she posted in for sale on Amazon as fan fiction under a different name and then watched a people tried to figure out who wrote it. It's erotic Glamourist fiction. Amusing!
I also read the first episode of Bookburners, from Serial Box, and quite enjoyed it. I'm not sure how to count those in my book tally; maybe one season equals one book? So I'll put an (8) here and update you all when I read more of it.
Well. Time to settle in for the day. I'm hoping to carve out some writing time this weekend around the copyediting, since all I have left to do on my middle-grade project is to rewrite the climax and the ending. It's coming together.
Blood and kisses, everyone!

i'm slipping under

I am Zombie-Lauren again today. That's right, sleeplessness struck again last night; I got around five broken hours of sleep is all. Everything's a little foggy, a little hazy around the edges. . . . I'm trying to ignore it and function as usual, but the lack of sleep does make things feel dreamlike.
I'm writing this while waiting for the subway to my polling place so I can vote. Another Tuesday evening, another packed subway platform. Then home to do some cooking and some freelance work. Exciting!
I finished a book the other day:
6) This Savage Song by Victoria Schwab. New YA!! So good! It's a fascinating take on dystopian American society, plus monsters. It's not released yet so I won't say anything more than that, but as always I really enjoyed V's world building, story, language, and pacing. Definitely recommended!
I have some more writing from friends that I need to load onto my Kindle and devour, which I'm looking forward to quite a bit. I'll report in as much as I can about those things!
I may be joining a second writing group. I know, I know, I was just talking about over commitment the other day. But I'm already trying to write regularly, they only meet once a month, and they're local VP grads. How could I not?? However, that means I need to throw together an audition story to send them, and in my sleepless fog, that feels a little daunting. I don't want to send them something from a while ago, or a MG thing, or a novel chunk. I want to send them something fresh. I know I've been improving. I guess I just have to hope the gods grant me a good night of sleep sometime soon with a good chunk of writing time directly following it.
Blood and kisses!

another brick that i laid

So far this week has been pretty rough, because I have been trying SO HARD to do ALL the things so I can get caught up at work. Between my efforts and our new in-house freelancer, I'm really getting somewhere! But the consequence is that by the time I get home, I'm Zombie-Lauren. That's not fun. And it means there's no writing happen, which also isn't fun! Today will be my last zombie day though. I have to rest up Wednesday/Thursday nights, because this weekend I'm attending Mary Robinette Kowal's Short Story Intensive class, and I have to be awake and functional for that. I'm really looking forward to it! Hopefully it'll inspire some great short story work for me.
What do you all think of short stories? Love them? Hate them? Any favorite short story writers?
Onward and forward; there's housework and writing in my near future. Blood and kisses!

progress!

Just a quick entry to say that my writing weekend was lovely, and on Sunday after returning from Philly I had brunch with two good friends and then finished two freelance projects. And then last night . . . (drumroll please) . . . I finished my restructure/rewrite draft of the ghost/witch novel! YES!! I'm sending it out to beta readers momentarily. And then digging in to my next freelance project. And spending fifteen minutes plotting out some of the changes I'll be making to my middle grade book. And cooking a veggie thing for my lunches for the remainder of the week. Productive!
What are you all up to these weeknight evenings?
Blood and kisses, everyone!

enough already!

When David Bowie passed away earlier this month, I wrote a blog post about it. And then Alan Rickman died. And the I scratched my cornea. And then a coworker passed away. And then I got a nasty winter cold. For each of these things, I thought about writing a blog post, and just never got to it. And now all I can really say is, what the hell, 2016? You're supposed to be better than your predecessor, but that was a pretty shitty start! The rest of this year better be an improvement. The bar is low. You can do it, 2016. SHEESH.
At least I'm feeling good about the writing end of things. I have two weekly online writing dates, plus the critique group, plus all my VP and WtO classmates to talk writing with/swap crits with/etc. Slowly but steadily, I do feel like I'm creating the life I want to be leading.
I've been doing a lot of cooking. Kale pesto, spinach pesto, banana bread, homemade granola, soups, vegetarian enchiladas . . . I'm trying really hard to use all the farm share produce and all the food my roommate brings home from her catering gig. It's been a little intense! But I'm really enjoying spending more time in the kitchen. There's something meditative about it, and it's totally different than anything else I've been doing.
And on that note, it's late, I should go to bed and hope tomorrow is an improvement, healthwise. Blood and kisses, everyone!

a new blog post for a new year

Well, here we are. January, 2016. Last year went by in a blur. I’m not going to dwell on 2015; there were a number of things about it that were not good. But there were some other things that were good. It was a year of transition, and those are always difficult. Now I’m choosing to look forward. The transition year has left me poised to move ahead confidently in the direction of my art, and I’m excited to do so. I don’t really do New Year’s resolutions, but I like to do goals, so here are my (vague) goals for 2016: Take better care of myself. Write more. Freelance less. Give myself more down time. 

How about you? What are your goals or resolutions or dreams for 2016?

I will tell you one highlight of 2015: my partner-in-crime and I adopted a kitten. We still have Zoe, our smart, beautiful, antisocial girl who is now almost nine. And now we have Isabel. She's a delightful terror, and is eight months old. I'll post some photos at some point, I promise.

I read a lot more books than I blogged about in 2015. There’s not time to discuss them all, so here’s a list of some of my favorites from last year that I haven't mentioned previously: Magonia by Maria Dahvana Headley, The Archivist Wasp by Nicole Kornher-Stace, Chimes at Midnight and The Winter Long by Seanan McGuire, Uprooted by Naomi Novik.

I’ll leave you with links to two blog entries that I read the other morning and found inspiring:

https://mariadahvanaheadley.wordpress.com/2015/11/06/taking-writing-risks-new-adult-novel-sold-to-fsg-and-more/

http://pacificrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2016-new-direction.html

Blood and kisses, and Happy New Year!

why do we?

Happy New Year, everybody! This'll be a fairly brief entry, but hey, first Friday of the year and here I am blogging!
I hope you all had a good holiday season. I spent mine in Oregon visiting family and friends. As always, it was great and too short, and I'm happy to be home. I helped my dad move offices, saw a friend who I lost track of when I moved out here a decade ago, got drunk with one of my favorite people in Oregon, spent a day with my best friend, and spent a couple evenings with my oldest goddaughter and her toddler. And on New Year's Eve, my mom and I made a Scandinavian dinner. It was great! I flew home yesterday, and awoke today to . . .
. . . a cold. That's right, the traveling funk got me this time. It's not TERRIBLE, just a runny nose and a scratchy throat and some tiredness. I'm going about my day around it. I just hope it doesn't last long.
My 2014 was a roller coaster. Some great things happened (VP! WtO!) and some terrible things happened (my grandfather passing). Some things were stressful (day job) while some things were fun (the workshops, and the pool league). I think 2014 was better than 2013 was, but I'd like to see 2015 do well for itself. And to that end, I've declared 2015 to be the year of self-care, and the year of piss-off-I'm-writing. On the self-care side of things, I'm going to start exercising again. I went for a long walk today! It's a start! I'm going to continue to be more conscious of my diet. I'm going to delve further into canning/preserving. On the writing side of things . . . Well, that's fairly self-evident, I think. I also want to read more. I didn't read NEARLY enough last year.
Do any of you have resolutions or goals to share for this year? Or thoughts on how the last year has gone?
And now, I'm off to eat homemade chicken soup and get back to my proofreading, because there's writing time this evening if I get enough work done. Happy Friday!

since i could say

It's been a while. I'll not make excuses; I feel like I do that so often when I come here. It is what it is, and that's all. A few things of note have happened:
Writing the Other, the workshop I attended in June that was hosted by Mary Robinette Kowal, was amazing. Three days of intense lectures and discussion about how to approach race, sexuality, disability, history, etc. in writing, followed by three days of writing time. I made some good friends, and write a lot of words, and had some great conversation. And baked pie with Mary and Stina, and played LARP croquet. It was perfect. I find myself still mulling over points made in various discussions, and I definitely view books I read through a different lens than I did previous to this workshop.
Shortly after attending Writing the Other, I found out that I was accepted to Viable Paradise, a weeklong writing workshop held every October in Martha's Vineyard that's taught by prominent editors and writers in the SF/F community. I'm going to Viable Paradise!! YEAH!!
Pool: I'm finally settling into my game and improving as a player. Which is great. Both teams I play on are doing really well this season, and I'm really enjoying it.
We've managed to go camping twice now this summer, and it's been SO NICE to get out of the city. Both camping weekends were beautiful, lots of mellow time around a campfire. Reading time. The second weekend I was barefoot most of the time, reconnecting with the earth. I need to do that more often, out of the city, feet on the dirt, surrounded by trees.
Last weekend we spent at the beach with a friend and her family. Like the camping weekends, it was great to get out of the city and breathe in the salt air of the ocean. We were on Fire Island, which is a phenomenal beach, clean and lovely. And I only got a little sunburned.
Books:
12) The Near Witch by Victoria Schwab. This book has a fantastic eerie fairy-tale quality to it. Definitely recommended.
13) Queen of Kings by Maria Dahvana Headley. Cleopatra as undead? Awesome! Seriously, this is a good read. A grim, unsettling version of what happened to Cleopatra and Antony. I can't wait to read more from Maria Dahvana Headley.
14) Shadowfell by Juliet Marillier. I really enjoyed this read. It's about a young girl in troubled times in a fantastical land who loses her family and is helped along her journey to figure out who she is and where she belongs by several mysterious figures. Great fantasy YA. And the first in a trilogy, I believe; I'll have to go find the others.
15) Sixty-one Nails by Mike Shevdon. One of the blurbs on the cover of this urban fantasy says, "Neverwhere for a new generation." I don't think this one is quite as good as Neverwhere (which is one of my most favorite books ever) but I did really enjoy this. It's dark, but it has a sharp sense of humor and the fairy folk are interesting, not the traditional elves etc. I definitely want to read the sequel.
16) The Gaslight Dogs by Karin Lowachee. This was a really interesting read, especially through the lens of the Writing the Other workshop. Picture an alternate version of early America, when the white settlers were fighting with the Native Americans, but add expeditions to the north, one of which brings home an Inuit girl suspected of witchcraft. It doesn't actually take place in America, but the parallels are clear, and it was really interesting to read the approach to both Sjenn (the Inuit girl) and the interactions between the colonizers and the oppressed indigenous groups. While I was somewhat dissatisfied with the ending--I felt that there was more story to be told--I thought that Lowachee did a good job with approaching writing other cultures carefully and respectfully.
17) Three Parts Dead by Max Gladstone. Holy hell I enjoyed this book. Magic, fantasy, corporate intrigue, dead gods, and gargoyles; what's not to love? The writing was snappy and sharp, the characters well drawn, the plotting tight. I'm excited to read the rest of this series. I'd recommend this to anyone who likes fantasy.
I did a good job taking care of myself this year until this summer, when I sort of fell off the wagon. Not that I've been crazy, I just have fallen out of my good habits. On Friday I reinstituted them. So far, so good!
And now, I've got four and a half hours until pool starts. I intend to write 500 words, edit at least five pages of Emmelina, start my proofreading project, and handwash some sweaters before I have to leave. Think I can do it? I do! Happy Sunday!

the breeze drifts on by

The world just keeps on turning, doesn't it? Whether or not you want it to, life just keeps on plodding along, and the commitments keep on stacking up, and the work, and the lack of time and sleep and energy. It's intense. And it's such a fine line for me. I am happy beyond happy that I am fortunate enough to spend all day every day working on books. To surround myself with story, with language, is a blessing. But sometimes I get swallowed whole by other people's stories, and lose track of my own. And that's what has happened for a good portion of this year so far. There's some irony there, in spending so much of this "year of me" on other people and their work so far.
Please don't take this as a horrible complaint. I take full responsibility for it. I, and only I, have made the choices I have made. I accept that. I accept them. I also accept the fact that learning how to focus more on myself, on my own wants and needs, is more than the flip of a switch that I thought it would be. It takes time. And effort. And frustration, and more effort. But I can get there. And I will.
Only two freelance projects stand between me and the time to write again. So I'd best hurry through them.
I think that part of the problem is a sense of validity. With my day job and my freelancing, I can go to bookstores and point out tangible proof of my efforts. I help other people improve their art. With the writing, there is no proof of anything yet. It's intangible. Which means that I don't always feel that it's valid to take time away from the tangible money-making tasks to indulge in the act I am most passionate about. Intellectually, I know that's silly; I need to spend time on my writing in order to improve, in order to find an agent, in order to sell books. Emotionally, even though I inch closer and closer to it, I think I'm still afraid of taking the plunge and truly focusing on it, truly pushing myself. I need to figure out how to get over that. I don't want to spend the rest of my life improving other people's art, as nice and fulfilling as that is. I want to spend the rest of my life improving MY art.
Anyway. A book and a dream for you, and then I need to get back to work. So without further ado . . .
9) The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater. Why on earth did I wait so long to read this book? I love everything I've read by Maggie, and this one is no exception. It's beautiful and sharp and cuts like a knife, and it hurt SO GOOD to read this. I love Blue and Adam the most, though the other raven boys are endearing, too. I love Blue's strange family, and how the weird is the normal, for them. I have the next book, and will read it soon. Some books/authors just cleave to your soul and never leave, and that's how I feel about this series and Maggie's Wolves of Mercy Falls trilogy as well. They turn me inside out, they make me cry and give me hope all at once.
Dream: Last night, it started with a little boy. I was on some sort of public transportation (train or bus, not plane) and he was with his mother across the aisle and I think one row of seats up. He was upset, and his mother wasn't succeeding in calming him down. I got tired of his wailing, and asked if he would like to sit next to me and color in my notebook with my pen. He and his mother accepted, and he sat with me for however long we were all on the train. And by the end of it I was fast friends with him, and his mother adored me. Then the scene changed; I was in a swamp, I think, surrounded by green trees covered with ropey vines that seemed as though they leaned down to greet me as I passed. I was working at some sort of waterside (partially floating) plant nursery, I think it was. I was moving potted plants, talking to people, that sort of thing, although it had a bit of a museum feeling to it as well. A gaggle of girls showed up, and in my dream I had flashes of memory about hanging out with one of them; we were good friends. She was the older sister of the boy I'd befriended on the train, and at this point I was friends with the whole family. I left work to hang out with the girls at the family's house, which was huge and labyrinthine. We were eating snacks from the fridge and generally being saucy girls, laughing and trying each others' clothing on and etc. Then I scene changed again, I was no longer at the house. I was maybe at my own? Although I don't recall what it was like. What I do recall is calling my friend, but her mother answered, and she wasn't there. "But Edward is, why don't you come over to hang out with him?" I was intrigued. I knew there was an older brother but didn't know him, so I did. I let myself in and went to his bedroom door and knocked, and when he said I could enter I slowly pushed the door open and he was laying in bed, only his face and a bit of dark curly hair showing. I gave him a flirty smirk, and at the same time I could tell that there was something really wrong with him that only I could fix. (Truly. This was not a "Fix the bad boy's attitude" thing. He was ill, or hexed, or something.) So I made friends with him and I was healing him with plants and such, and got so comfortable with the family that I was basically one of them, although Edward stayed fiercely self-conscious around me. For some reason I thought of him as the Sea King, though if that was true or not I don't know. I wish I'd stayed asleep through the end of the dream to see if I'd healed him; he was only partially better when I woke.
And now, back to work so I can finish these projects so I can get back to mine. Happy Thursday!

way down by the sycamore tree

How's 2014 treating everyone so far? Things are okay over here. I wrapped up all of my freelance commitments so I've finally gotten back to editing. Emmelina and the Rat King first, and I'll follow that with the ghost/witch book. I feel like I'm really moving in the right direction with both of them. The climax in Emmelina needs a solid edit and cleanup, but I like where it's going. I'm still torn about what to write next, though. I've been thinking about the fey folk/secret society project for a while now, but for some reason I'm not totally convinced. Maybe that's just because I haven't properly focused on it, but maybe it's a sign that I should write something else next. Maybe my zombie novel? Something to think about. I'll keep writing short stories in the Twilight Child universe, regardless of what novel comes next. I know that eventually the Twilight Child materials will turn into something bigger, but I'm not ready for that yet. She's been in my head for so long; I really want to do her and her world justice, and I don't think I'm quite there yet.
It's been quite snowy and cold here in NYC. I know many people don't enjoy it, but I do. I'm a winter girl. Give me the cold snap, give me the air so frozen that taking a breath is like taking a drink of cold running water, give me the drifts of snow clinging to sidewalk and car and fence. It makes me feel happy, and calm, and in balance. That said, I do enjoy all four seasons. But winter is my favorite.
I've only read three books so far this year. I blame that on all the work I did in January. There's time to catch up! My goal is forty-five books again this year. And, while three doesn't sound like a brilliant start, I did reject five or six other books between these three, so I'm going through my books at a decent clip even though I'm not reading all of them!
1) Blood Magic by Tessa Gratton. I love this book. LOVE. The characters, the magic, the shifting undercurrent of tension. It was really well done. It's about magic and love and family and death and making choices. Go out and buy this one; you won't regret it! I can't wait to read more of her books!
2) Sandman Slim by Richard Kadrey. This one knocked me off my feet, too, although it's extremely different than the first book I read this year. This one is gritty and snarky and dangerous and downright funny at times, and you can't help cheering for Stark as he tries to get revenge for the murder of his girlfriend.
3) The Hum and the Shiver by Alex Bledsoe. This book is a really interesting take on magic, family, and war and music. Highly recommended, especially for people who like urban fantasy and folk music.
And now, I have a lot still to do today, so I'm off to do it. Happy Saturday, everyone!