Briefly

It's 5 pm, and I could be going home now, but instead I'm inhabiting my little virtual home for just a moment. I just have a couple of things I'd like to get off my chest.
First, why are plane tickets so expensive around the holidays?!? I mean, really. I don't have that kind of spare change laying around, do you?
Second, I was at my partner-in-crime's house the other day, and out of the blue he looked at me and said, "You know, so-and-so and I were talking about you the other day. The way you dress. She thinks you could really dress better than you do. And I think so, too. You know, you could do a really funky business-casual look . . ." And my only response was, "I like the way I dress, thank you, and why on earth were you discussing my style choices with so-and-so???" I was totally offended. He basically just told me that he doesn't think I look that good on a regular basis. What would you say, if your partner-in-crime said something like that? Ugh. I was disgusted at the lack of thoughtfulness.
Third, last night I dreamed that I was on some sort of trip to the west coast, and I was at this big shopping/entertainment center type place, and was wandering around with my sister J. Our whole extended family was there, and lots of friends too, including what-if boy, and I was having such a nice time hanging out with him but then he disappeared and then I had to get on the airplane to leave (conveniently located just outside the entertainment center). So J and I got on the plane to leave, but then the pilot told us we wouldn't be leaving for a couple hours, so I made them open the door and let me out. I went back into the entertainment center and found what-if boy, who said he'd left for a while because he had to go to work, or had to talk to someone, or something. And I was glad I'd found him again before I had to leave. There was an earlier dream, but it's quite hazy and vague. Something about being on a ship. There was a group of us. And we were lost, and trying to get home. The ship was large, and there was something dangerous on board with us, but I can't remember what. A vague recollection of playing some music on a record player, and an overall sense of foreboding and tension. That's all I've got for that one.
And now, time to go home. I've got quite a lot to do!

Unsure

A friend of a friend just found out that he tested positive for HIV. He is one of the safest people I know. I'm absolutely baffled. How could this have happened to him?
New York is the epicenter of the HIV/AIDS epidemic in America (to quote a website I was just reading). Approximately 1 in 70 people in New York is infected with HIV. Let me say that again: 1 in 70. That's a terrifying number in a city of over 8 million residents. The same website says that HIV is the third leading cause of death in New Yorkers below the age of 65. This worries me. No, it terrifies me. There are so many sick people out there. Are we doing enough to help them? Are they doing enough to help themselves? I don't know. It seems like no one has any real answers.
I know four people here who are HIV positive. That I'm aware of. And they are some of my favorite people here. It just makes me sick at heart to know that they have this disease eating at them. And the person who just found out? Imagine the heartache and the fear that he is dealing with as I type this. I cannot imagine having a bomb like that dropped on me. It would be devastating. I wish I could just give him a hug and tell him that everything will be all right, but I can't. Because for him, nothing will ever really be all right again.
Now, I know that there are drugs out there now that can prolong an HIV positive life by years, even decades. But that doesn't mean that he won't get sick, that he won't have hard times because of it. The other people I know who are HIV positive have had it for quite a while, and they do get really sick. Sometimes for months at a time. And every time, I worry for them. And I pray, to all the gods and goddesses out there in the universe, that they will get better.
None of these people asked for this. And now they have to deal with it for their whole lives. Hard times. Really hard times.
I don't even really know what I'm trying to say here, except to express my agony for this friend who just found out, and for the others who have lived with it for years. If there was something I could do for them that would fix it, I would. Without a question. And for you, my few readers, please, please be careful. Get tested every year. Take precautions in sketchy situations. Just be careful. And, though they're nameless and faceless for you, please keep my friends in your thoughts. I do, every day.

Post-Election Entry

I'm sure that there are hundreds of thousands of bloggers out there who are covering the election in detail, and have been for months, so all I will say is this: Thank the 'verse that Obama got elected! I'm excited to see what the future brings.
And on that happy note, I present to you some whining. I know, nobody really reads blogs just to listen to someone else whine, so I'll keep it brief. I started looking at plane tickets to go home for Christmas, and the cheapest one is FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS. And that's before taxes and fees. Which is just awful, for a poor girl like me. But I'll suck it up and do it anyway. No way am I not going home for the holidays. and it's looking like I might be there for Yule, which would be great! I could do ritual with my friend A again. It's been years. Far too long. But ouch, that five hundred dollar ticket is going to hurt. . . .
Finished a book yesterday: The Dead Travel Fast by Eric Nuzum. It's fun reading, sort of
a cultural history of vampires, if you will. I enjoyed it. But it's not a keeper. Somehow I expected a little more out of it, I think. I wanted a little more analysis, a little more serious discussion, and this book was pretty light-hearted and anecdotal. Still, it's definitely worth a read. Reading it did make me want to go out and find a serious study on vampires in modern-day culture, or throughout history, or something.
Oh, and a big sigh of relief: I finished editing my novel. Well, I finished the first go-round of editing. Now I just have to type in all the new sections and email it out!
Anyway. I haven't done this in a while, but I thought I'd toss up some goals for November:

• read four books
• nail down the first two movements of Musczynski's Time Pieces
• type in all my edits and get my novel out to my readers
• two freelance projects
• get started on Yule gifts

I think that's plenty, don't you? I do!
I'm sure there was more I wanted to say, but it was time to go home ten minutes ago, and every time I get the blank screen in front of my my mind turns to jelly, so I'll just say ta for now, and I'll ramble on again sometime soon.

Happy Samhain!

I wanted to do a nice long rambling post today about this holiday, what it means to me as a pagan, etc. However, work got the better of me. I just finished proofreading the spring/summer catalog for one of our imprints, and now have to run home to throw something costume-ish on before heading out for the night. So, have a good weekend, and a lovely Samhain, and I'll do that long rambling post as soon as I have the Internet in front of me again!

random thoughts

• It's damn hot in my office. I shouldn't be sweating in a tanktop when it's 45 degrees out.
• My job is distinctly Sisyphean. It doesn't matter how much work I get done in any single day, there is always more work to be done.
• I've been craving popcorn for weeks now. Maybe after I get paid I'll actually buy some.
• They finally turned the heat on in my building! Thank goodness!
• I may finish editing my novel tonight. We'll see what happens. If I do, you can be sure I'll make a big to-do out of it right here.
• More people should listen to Nine Inch Nails, especially the album Pretty Hate Machine.
• Tonight I am doing yoga, working on my book, eating squash and green beans (hopefully) for dinner, and watching Bram Stoker's Dracula. My evening is full of awesome!

Killing time

That's right, I'm sitting in what-if boy's apartment, waiting for my good friend A to arrive and rescue me from my boredom. It's actually been a really nice, quiet, mellow morning. Lots of Internet time, a little Dracula reading. The wedding I'm on the west coast for is tomorrow night, so there's plenty of time to hang out and catch up with A and what-if boy. (And yes, he's totally still hot! *drool*)
What have I been reading lately, you ask? Well, the obvious answer first: I'm mid-Dracula. I've read it before, years ago, and am really enjoying reading it again. I'm just a sucker for a good vampire story and, well, it doesn't get any better than Dracula! Also . . . let's see. The Year's Best Fantasy and Science Fiction for Teens. Good collection, including two of my favorite writers, Garth Nix and Kelly Link. (Notice I didn't say favorite teen writers. That's because truly great writing transcends age labels.) I'm honestly struggling to think of the last book I finished before that; lately there's been a run of starting books, being unthrilled with them, and setting them aside. It always makes me a little sad when a book isn't nearly as good as it could be. . . .
I'm waiting impatiently for season two of Shadow Unit to start. If you're not familiar, check it out! I know the premise sounds a little strange, but really, read one episode. You'll be hooked. Well, if that's your kind of thing you will be. I loved it desperately after a few paragraphs, and have been recently haunting the message boards, waiting for a sign that season two is coming.
I'm nearly done editing my novel, hallelujah! I only have the climax and the ending to go through, and while I know I'll be adding some material, I'm not really changing anything, only drawing things out a little more, so it won't be terribly difficult. So the question that keeps haunting me is, of course, what should I write next? I'm not really to that point yet; first there will be another go-round on the editing of this novel. But I can't help thinking about it. And I've got a few ideas, as well. So, give me some input. Should I write:
1) a young adult novel about a girl who finds herself beholden to the Rat King?
2) an urban fantasy novel very loosely based on my experiences as a witch?
3) work on some short stories (eventually I'd like to do a collection of stories based on my dreams, since they tend to be very vivid and storyline based)?
4) one of the novels I started in high school/college? (I'm about sixty pages in on each, one is an urban fantasy about a woman who has to rescue her brother from the fey folk, the other is a fantasy about a thief who fulfills an ancient prophecy.) (I never said they were brlliant.)
Or 5) an urban fantasy-ish novel based on some poems I wrote in college abotu a character called Twilight Child?
Clearly my problem is not ideas, it's the time to write them all in!
One more thing before I go. I just discovered a new band, thanks to a friend of a friend's blog. Check out these guys: Natalie Portman's Shaved Head
And now, time to jet. Have a good weekend!

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I don't have words for how horrifying this is.
What is it in the collective subconscious of America that tells people that violence like this is acceptable? How do people justify it to themselves? Is there something in the mythology of America that breeds monsters?