Two things

First, I've realized that I don't like Green & Black's chocolate. It's expensive. It's dry, and the flavor is flat. and I now have most of a bar of it sitting in my desk drawer because I'm not really interested in it, after having a nibble. Sigh.
Second, sometimes it doesn't pay to be nice to your doorman. There's a very nice gentleman who is the doorman in the building I work in. I say good morning every day, because that's the polite thing to do. I thank him when he holds an elevator for me, etc. Well, this afternoon he called me and said "There's a gentleman here who wants to talk to somebody and I don't know who he should talk to. Will you talk to him?" I, confused, said sure. And was then regaled with this random man's sob story about how he's crippled and ill and it was so difficult for him to get here and he knows that we don't take unsolicited manuscripts but he self-published a book and it got very good reviews and couldn't I find someone to take a look at it? UGH. I repeatedly told this man that I wouldn't know who to give it to, that we don't accepted unsolicited manuscripts, that there's nothing I can do for him. His response? "Well, I could've just mailed it if I'd known I couldn't get in. Couldn't you just get me in to talk to an editor for five minutes?" NO I CAN'T. That is NOT the way the publishing industry works. And him making me feel bad about saying no after he traveled three and a half hours does not make me want to help him! If he knows we don't accept unsolicited manuscripts, why was he trying to get me to take it?
Sorry for the rant. People like that really make me angry. He does NOT get special treatment for showing up on our doorstep. He does NOT get special treatment just because his self-pubbed book got good reviews. He has to go through the process, just like everybody else. And while I was perfectly polite to this man, I really wanted to tell him to piss off and then hang up. And then I wanted to call back and tell the doorman to never, EVER do that to me again! (I'm sure he was badgered into calling someone, anyone, by this pesky guy with the book to pitch, but still.)
And now that I've gotten that off my chest, I'll get back to work. Hopefully I'll manage a more upbeat post over the weekend!

Sometimes

Sometimes it's hard to find the time to blog consistently. Sad but true. Work is a constant state of busyness for me, so personal computer things rarely happen. And when I get home I don't often want to spend time staring at a computer screen when I've just spent all day doing that! So, here I am, struggling blogger that I am. Oh well.
I've decided to take some time off from freelancing. I was pretty burned out before that last project, and it was really, really hard to make myself sit down and work on that one. I persevered, it's done, and a big paycheck is on its way, but I should not have taken that project. So, time off. I'll be broke, but I'll save my sanity. Besides which, I want to be spending a lot of time on my book right now, not other people's!
And speaking of, the editing is going a little more slowly that I would like. But it's going. And I feel pretty good about the work I've done. I'm adding some big new scenes, and sort of resculpting the rest to make it even cleaner and tighter than it was before. I've gotten some interesting feedback from several people now, which is great. Good feedback always makes me look at things from a new perspective, even if I don't actually use the feedback. I love that other people can opens my eyes to things in my own story!
Only one book that I've read recently to discuss. But that book is The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay, by Michael Chabon. This was a reread for me, and I found it to be every bit as wonderful as the first time around. The language? Beautiful. The descriptions of the comic books? Brilliant. And the story itself is so touching; even those of us too young to remember the horror of WWII can empathize with Joe and Sam and Rosa through their personal trials and tribulations. The decisions that they make are so understandable, even when not entirely logical, that you can't help but agree with them. I love this book. If I ever made a top ten book list, this one would probably be on it. (Hmm, that would make an interesting blog sometime, wouldn't it?)
Anyway. There's a cup of coffee and an episode of LOST waiting for me. After that is a run, some clarinet and some bass, and then editing my book. I think it'll be a good afternoon.

the weight has lifted

I turned in an eight-hundred page freelance project on Wednesday. What a relief! With the exception of Memorial Day weekend, I've had solid freelance work since mid-March. Which is crazy. So I'm taking a month off from it. No freelancing until the new Charles de Lint comes in and it's time for me to proofread it, because oh yes, that freelance project is mine. But I need to be a little more choosy about the projects I take. Not that I mind taking projects I don't really enjoy. It's more that I've really ran myself into the ground over the last couple of months, and I need to teach myself to not do that. Taking time out for myself is important. Working on my book is important. Sleeping enough is important.
That's the theme for this summer. Treating myself with respect and doing what I need to do for my own health and happiness. It'll be good. And on that note, although there are only ten days left in June, I do have a to-do list:
- organize my kitchen properly
- make some serious headway in editing my book
- start running regularly again
- read another book or two
Sounds good, doesn't it? I feel like I'm taking it easy on myself, if that's all I've got for June, but that's enough, I think. July's list will be bigger, I'm sure.
Some recent reads:
The Book of Joe, by Jonathan Stropper: This book was so much better than I thought it was going to be! It's about a man who writes a fictionalized expose of his hometown. Several years later his father falls into a coma and he goes home for the first time since high school. And then his life falls apart. The writing is clever, the dialogue is witty, and the relationships between the characters are wholly believable. I definitely recommend this one, and I enjoyed it enough that I'll be on the lookout for his other books.
Wicked Lovely, by Melissa Marr: A great YA urban fantasy about a girl who can see fey folk, and how her life changes when the Summer King decides he wants her for his Queen. Well written; I love YA books with believable teenagers. I put this one right up there with Holly Black and Cassandra Clare, which means very high marks.
Lucky Dog, by Mark Barrowcliffe: I read this one for a book club I'm in. And it was a fun, lighthearted romp, about a man who accidentally acquires a dog and then discovers that the dog talks, but only to him. Hijinks ensue, involving a gambling ring, a dirt real-estate deal, his girlfriend, and his employee. It was fun. Not a keeper, by any means. It had some really nice moments, but it just didn't catch my attention enough.
On the subject of books, on Wednesday night I went to a reading at KGB Bar. As part of the Fantastic Fiction reading series that they host every third Wednesday, they had Terri Windling and her partner Howard Gayton. Interestingly, Terri did not read any fiction. Instead, she read from a nonfiction work-in-progress about fairy tales and folklore. Whenever she came to an actual story, Howard would take over and read aloud in a very droll, British, lovely fashion. Fascinating stuff about the history of certain fairy tales (Snow White, Little Red Riding Hood, Sleeping Beauty). And it really reminded me, as Mythic Journeys always does, that this is what's important to me. The act of creation, the sharing and telling of stories. The understanding of where our stories, our fairy tales, our myths, come from and why they are important. I left there feeling rejuvenated as a creative and spiritual person. I find it fascinating that certain people, certain moments, certain works of art can make me feel this way. Can actually change my outlook on things and remind me what's truly important. I just wish I had those reminders more often, because, as we all do, I sometimes lose track of my path, and wander in the woods for a time, feeling more and more lost and alone and uncertain, until one of those moments or people comes along and shows me my path again. That is what we all need to spend more time cultivating. An understanding of our path. Not just where we are going, not just where we have been or where we are now, but the whole arc of our own story, and how our stories fit in with others.
Well. After all that seriousness, I think it's time to go back to my lovely apartment for some clarinet and some writing time. I'll be back here again soon, to post about book progress and whatnot.

A proper ramble

Well. Life has been busy since my last post. New Orleans was beautiful, and humid, and amazing. I really like it there. I would live there. The history of the city is fascinating, the people are friendly, the architecture is lovely. I even enjoyed the humidity. Here's a couple pictures for you:




Gorgeous. If I had the money I would definitely buy an apartment in the French Quarter! The cemetery was really interesting, with all the mausoleums. The swamp tour was great, all cypress trees and shallow water and alligators. I, of course, got really sunburned. But it was so nice to be out of New York for a few days, and to see some of my family. There are these amazing junk shops on Decatur Street, just past the French Market; they have the neatest stuff, and it's just piles and piles of it. I bought a copper footed colander, and a malachite ring. And a partial set of silverware.
June is shaping up to be busy month for me. Three friends have birthdays, so there are a couple different happenings, plus the Renegade Craft Fair is next weekend. And I (of course) have a freelance project, and am trying to edit my own book, and I'm hunting for just the right chair to go with the desk I bought last weekend. So much to do, so little time . . .
Two nights ago I had some people over for a poker game. It was the first time I'd had people over to my apartment, and it was loads of fun. My work spouse won both games! It just means I'll have to host more games, so everyone can try to win their money back from him.
Anyway. There's more to post about (books I've read, bands I've started listening to, summer goals) but I think I'll save it for a day or two. I need to get cracking on my freelance project.

Vacation!

Well, things have been hectic, and too busy, and just plain crazed, but now I get to take a step back and relax because in two and a half hours I'll be on a plane, winging my way to New Orleans! Yeah! I hope everybody has a great weekend, and I promise pictures and a longer post when I return. Happy Memorial Day Weekend!

Been a While

I know, it's been a while. Partially because I just haven't had much exciting to say. Partially because I've been, well, busy. Anyone surprised by that? No, I didn't think so.
As per usual, I've read a couple of good books lately:
Summerland, by Michael Chabon: I love this man's writing. His voice is so peculiar and unique, and so full of whimsy. Summerland is about a boy named Ethan who reluctantly plays on a baseball team and lives with his scientist father. One day he gets recruited as hero for the ferishers, the wee folk who live in his area, and crazy adventures occur where he meets werefoxes, Sasquatches, giants, baseball stars, and Coyote. It's great fun, and wonderful to watch Ethan and his friends discover themselves. That said, this isn't my favorite book by him. There is such love for baseball just oozing out of this book, I just can't quite get into that. I'm not a sports fan. But the writing is wonderful and the characters are fully fleshed out, and I do think it's very interesting how Chabon combines Native American folklore with a new angle on fairy folk and with a well-loved American pastime.
Middlesex, by Geoffrey Eugenides: I'm not even sure where to start with this one. It was great. Complex, multigenerational, full of secrets and history and seamless storytelling. The main character, Cal, is easy to empathize with. I love the Greek mythological references. And he really nailed the pubescent angst of children in a few moments. Highly recommended. Highly. I've also read The Virgin Suicides, which I think was his first book, and loved that one as well. Part of it, again, is the language. I'm a sucker for a well-written book, and this one has some great poetic moments. There are some fabulous images; the San Francisco peep show, the car careening across the frozen river, the Zebra Room speakeasy. And the way the unraveling of the grandfather is portrayed, it's just so perfect.
Twilight, by Stephenie Meyer: What a great vampire book. It's YA, but the eroticism of smell, of touch, really surprised me. In a good way. The descriptions of Washington, the perpetual damp, the fog, the greenness of everything, was dead on, and the contrast of that with Arizona was great. But the characters . . . Again, just well drawn, easy to understand. It is so easy to feel for Bella, to feel with Bella, as she falls in love, and faces huge obstacles to that love. And for Edward, too. The control he must have, at all times, to be with the girl he loves. It's amazing. I can't wait to read the rest of this series. And then I can't wait to read it again.
Maybe at some point I'll start doing more in-depth critiques of the books I read. Someday. When I have more time.
In other news, I've started editing my book. I was hoping for more feedback from more people, but if I just sit around twiddling my thumbs, I'll never get anything done. I'll send emails to a couple of people whose feedback I was really hoping for, but I'm not expecting anything at this point. And it's been nice to dive back into the world I created for this book. I still feel good about it. I still feel like the first section is quite strong. I have some big decisions to make for later in the book (Should I bring back some "bad guys" from earlier in the book, so they're not loose ends? Maybe the climax should happen from a whole different perspective. Should Jair and Nor's parting be different? Should I cut/expand some of the desert time, or some of the jungle city time?) but I feel really good about it so far. Maybe a miracle will occur and I'll get through my whole edit in May, although it might be more realistic to say mid-June.
And as for my apartment, it's coming together slowly. I'm going flea-market shopping this weekend in hopes of finding something great. I don't know what, but something. For my living room I'm going for a bright, sort of ethnic feel. The bedroom is staying softer, more natural. Not sure what to do with my entryway or my kitchen, but that's okay, I'll figure it out.
I'm vacationing in New Orleans for Memorial Day Weekend, and I can't wait! If anybody has any recommendations for places to go, restaurants to eat in, etc., I'd love it.
And now back to my overwhelming workload . . .

I don't know...

I'm having one of those wondering mornings. You know, when you wake, look around, and wonder if your decisions have been the right ones. If you're doing the right thing. If you're in the right place. Mornings like this always leave me a bit off. Most of the time, I am happy with life in the big city. But was it really the right decision to move so far away from family and friends? Am I going to be happy forever in the publishing industry? Do I really love the city? And on a smaller scale, why do I do all the things that I do every day? Do they make me happy, or fulfilled? Do I want to do those things? Am I always doing something in an attempt to avoid thinking about things?
Agh. I'm too far in my head for a workday. I wish I could just snap out of it; there's far too much to be done to spend the morning mooning about.
A friend and I have decided that this summer is going to be Operation Feel Better About Ourselves. More running, more writing, eating better, dressing better, staying in our budgets, etc. I think it'll be really good for both of us. Because lately, I've been feeling schlumpy, with no clear way how to drag myself out of it. It's less than enjoyable, but what can you do? Well, clearly you can do things to make yourself feel better. (I think I just typed myself in a circle.)
I'm procrastinating on editing my novel. Why? Well, partially because I want feedback from more than one person before I begin. Partially because I've just been too busy between moving and freelancing. And partially, I don't know. I've always been a bit of a procrastinator with my writing, I suppose it's just an extension of that. But I think that I'll try to edit the whole thing in a month. That should be doable, as long as I stay focused. I've been thinking about what I want to do with it. The ending needs to take more time, and there's a conversation between Nor and Isha that needs to happen (although it may end up happening between Nor and Jair). Maybe more time in the jungle, as well, and I wonder if I should bring Myrthe back around into it somehow. She was such a large presence in the first portion of the book, it seems silly that she just disappears. But maybe I'll save her for a sequel.
Books:
The Loss of Leon Meed: This book was a pretty unique read. The premise is that there is a man named Leon Meed, who lives in Eureka, CA, and he begins randomly appearing and disappearing. The book follows the lives of the people who see Leon, how his appearance/disappearance affects their lives, how the lives of Leon's witnesses intersect, etc. It was really well-written. And it made me wonder about relationships, and how people connect over mutual experiences, and how people interpret the mysterious workings of the universe in different ways. This was definitely an intriguing book.
Little Grrl Lost: A YA Charles de Lint book, and we all know I always love his stuff. Although, I do feel that in recent years the morals in is stories have shifted closer to the surface of things, and I almost wonder if they're starting to be too obvious. Regardless, his writing is always magical, and his integration of the fantastic with the everyday is flawless. This is a great, fun, lighthearted urban fantasy novel about a six-inch-tall girl who runs away from home.
And now, I should get to work...