long shadows lure you in

Sometimes, this wild yearning rises up in my chest until I feel like I can't breathe. I want. I yearn. For what, I don't know, but the intensity of the desire is undeniable. This feeling steals into the room on the autumn breeze and leaves me aching. All I know is there is something I don't (can't) have, something that I need.
The beginning of autumn has come. And so, too, this need. Would that I could find better, deeper words for it, but there aren't any. And the only thing I can do to calm it even briefly is to go out, to be one with the elements, the wind and the rain and the kiss of the autumn air. It's like I need to be outside of my skin, I need to be something other than what I am. And so I go. And it never lasts. But I keep trying anyway, because I can't sit still when this desire rides me.
And so I go.